Trust is crucial to a successful marriage. Without it, neither person can thrive nor can the marriage.
The most obvious breach of trust in a marriage is when one party has an affair. Yet one that gets less attention and can be just as devastating is financial infidelity.
It can saddle both people with debt
When you marry someone you join your financial powers. That can work for the better, but it can also leave a financially responsible party liable for the spending of their less responsible spouse. Debts taken on during a marriage are typically considered the responsibility of both parties. That is why many lenders won’t lend without the signature of both spouses. Yet, if you have a joint credit card, the company already has both your signatures. It won’t care if your spouse is the one who maxes it out. As far as it is concerned, that is a joint debt.
It can put a strain on living standards
You come to the end of the month and find no money left to put food on the table or pay the energy bill. If you discover your spouse blew $500 on online poker, you would naturally be upset.
Guilt can trigger cover-ups
Your spouse knows you would be enraged if you discover what they have been spending on. So they lie. Maybe they say they lent the money to a friend in need. Perhaps they tell you they earned less this month than they actually did. One lie can lead to another and soon they are entangled in a web of their own making, unable to tell you the truth now they are so far in. That can lead you to feel they are being distant or evasive. Maybe you suspect they have been having an affair. All in all, it can do even more harm to the relationship.
If financial dishonesty has brought your marriage to an end, you’ll want help to try and redress the balance when negotiating the financial aspects of the divorce.